WBRS Sports Blog

Being up eight games on the Red Sox as we enter September certainly makes most New Yorkers content baseball fans. However one New Yorker seems to have a multitude of problems and criticisms concerning several aspects of the Yankees franchise...Michael Caraccioli, aka "The Kid from Brooklyn" is a successful president of a ticket brokerage located in New Jersey. However The Kid insists that acting is his true calling, and has posted several short rants on his website which for him serve as audition tapes, but are just downright amusing and ridiculous for just about everyone else.

Mike Paulus, the younger brother of Duke starting point guard Greg Paulus, has committed to the University of North Carolina...where he will play quarterback for the Tar Heels football team. Sure this fraternal rivalry would be much juicier if Mike shot hoops like his older bro, but there certainly is some intrigue. The question on everyone's mind is will Greg cheer for UNC during UNC-Duke football games and where do Mike's allegiance lie during a Tobacco Road classic on the hardcourt? Well, father Dave Paulus has already addressed that:

"The unique thing is they'll both be with us at the other's games. But I assure you that Mike won't cheer for Duke, and Greg won't cheer for Carolina. We know better."

We all know Greg was an elite quarterback in high school as well. Now all we need is for him to put on a Duke football jersey and go at it against his brother. Not only would that spice up the football aspect of the Duke-UNC rivalry, but the Blue Devils could use just about anything to draw some interest to their abysmal football team.

Working in a specific trade over time frequently correlates to an increase in responsibility, salary, and certainly respect around the office. Well, former Philadelphia Phillies groundskeeper Mark Carfagno seems to be the aberration to this generally accepted way of thought. It is now being reported that the 33-year groundskeeper veteran has filed an age discrimination lawsuit against the Phillies organization. How exactly did this employer-employee relationship go sour?

Now 53, Carfagno, a fan favorite in Philadelphia, has been working as a groundskeeper with the Phillies since he was 18 years old. In 2004, finally Carfagno thought he would be promoted to the head groundskeeper position, but the Phillies decided to go with some 29 year old instead. While this certainly upset Carfagno, comments from the new and younger boss referring to older groundskeepers as "bunch of geriatrics", and when talking to younger groundskeepers, "take the old guy (Carfagno) with you" must have got on his nerve. Later on in the season Carfagno was assigned garbage-pickup, which occupied the majority of his time at work. Last but certainly not least, Carfagno's customary seat behind home plate was revoked and instead was told he could view the game from the interior of the stadium shop.

Later in the 2004 season, the devastated Carfagno took a leave of absence as he was suffering from anxiety and depression. Upon returning to the job, he received a letter from the Phillies stating his absence was considered a resignation...I hope the Phillies pay big for treating a great person like such crap.

In NBA news, the Hawks traded Al Harrington for a the Pacers for a future 1st round pick. Some would say that it's good that the Hawks got anything for Harrington, considering his free agent status. However, getting a single pick (one mid-20s most likely) for a very good (not great) player is pretty weak compensation. Considering other rumors (to the Lakers for a combination of Mihm/George/Cook/draft pick, to the Nuggets for Joe Smith + a pick, to Golden State for Pietrus, others and a pick), this can only be seen as a failure for the Hawks. On the plus side they do have Josh Childress who has a mean 'fro, Josh Smith who can dunk and a sad mascot who drives a scooter around the Atl.

In NFL news, the Falcons traded T.J. Duckett for Ashley Lelie as part of a 3-way deal. Now this deal baffles me. I thought Roddy White filled the failed deep-threat WR position for the Falcons. Lelie had a nice 2004, but has done nothing but whine and complain since. Duckett, while not a #1 rb, was a great counterpart to Dunn and Vick, a guy who could come in and bang, softening up the defenses for Dunn and Vick to scamper around. Also, near the goal-line, he was money (27 TD over the past 3 years, 7 of last year's 8 TDs were within 3 yards). So they've traded the man who has scored more TDs than anyone else in a Falcons uniform over the last three years for a whiny WR who has a girl's name. Bad deal.

Thank the Lord, the people of Atlanta still have the winning traditions of the Braves.

Here is my team...

QB: Jake Plummer
QB: Trent Green
RB: Tiki Barber
RB: Willis McGahee
WR: Anquan Boldin
WR: Roy Williams
WR: Tony Gonzalez
WR: Drew Bennett
K: David Akers
D/ST: Chargers

Bench:
QB: Billy Volek
RB: Tatum Bell
RB: Ahman Green
WR: Kevin Curtis
WR: Rod Smith

Thoughts? Comments?

Okay fellas, I need some help here. My fantasy football draft is this evening and I have the 4th pick in the draft. Normally I wouldn't need assistance with picking, however this year is unique. In no season can I remember there being three dominant running backs so distinguished from all others. Of course I am referring to LaDainian Tomlinson, Larry Johnson, and Shaun Alexander. So, please help me determine the fate of my draft...with the fourth pick in my fantasy draft I should take???

Tiki Barber
Steven Jackson
Edgerrin James
Peyton Manning
Clinton Portis

Tiger Woods is just one shot back of the leaders as Saturday play begins this morning at the PGA Championship. In honor of Woods I have posted this clip of him in which he is caught farting and then giggles like a school girl as he realizes he was caught by the microphone...ENJOY!!! (pay attention at 29 seconds and after)

Team USA begins their play in Japan at 1:00 AM on Saturday. The game will be televised on ESPN2. ESPN's Fran Fraschilla has a column up, allowing readers to become better acquainted with the teams in the four respective groups. I believe the Team USA will get the job done, but certainly they face some stiff competition, specifically from Spain (Gasol, Calderon, Navarro), Argentina (Ginobli, Nocioni, Prigioni), Brazil (Barbosa, Varejao, Splitter), and the NBA-less but still talented Greece team (Papaloukas, Diamantidis, Spanoulis). Until Tony Parker recently broke his finger, I thought France could be a legitimate contender as well.

I say Team USA wins the 2006 FIBA World Championship, but they certainly will be challenged. Their biggest weakness is still their outside shooting, and I expect teams to force, or at least try to force Team USA to beat them from the perimeter.

The Rockets traded Rudy Gay and drafted a player without a head? Very bad draft.

Shawne Williams thinks you have huge Mahbles! Mahhhhhbles!

Rajon Rondo shows his dominant invisible piano skills.

Defensive-minded LaMarcus Aldridge blocks a huge erection with a basketball.

Quincy "smoke a" Douby seems to have lived up to his nickname before the photoshoot.

Renaldo Balkman still can't believe he got drafted. Either that or he's auditioning for a Right Guard commercial.

Getting photographed in front of bricks...I guess the photographer has no faith in Hilton Armstrong's jumpshot either.

After this picture Rondo and Ray jacked Pittsnogle's lunch money.

Perhaps the Maryland fans were right about Redick's sexuality...

Aldridge shows his versatility by showing he can block his erection with his arm as well.

And as a Laker fan, I'm quite disappointed that we drafted a dancing elf...

Photos courtesy of NBA.com

I guess it doesn't take much, but occasionally it's nice to write something that the major players get to much later...

Passan's article at Yahoo Sports

Meanwhile, we wrote a similar and much better version, The WBRS All-Rookie Team, a few weeks ago...

TAKE THAT YAHOO SPORTS

• NBA scouting seems to have gone too far
  
• Don't you hate when your Chinese symbol tattooist messes up your calf?
• The Mets catcher cheated on this? (nsfw)
• MLB playoff odds...Hey look the Cubs still have a .03% chance of making the playoffs!
• Ooo a female athlete with a wet t-shirt...
  

In last night's pre-season game between the Saints and the Titans, Titans mascot T-Rac (who looks like a pimp of a racoon) hit Saints back-up quarterback Adrian McPherson with a golf cart.

From the Tenessean:
"The mascot's vehicle hit McPherson, who stayed on the field for a few minutes being checked out by a trainer on the sideline. He then walked off the field.

'He got run over by a mascot,'' Saints Coach Sean Payton said of the 6-foot-3, 218-pound McPherson, who is the No. 3 quarterback. "We got to play the Titans and you have to worry about the mascots and all the other stuff going on. He's got a bruise, some kind of contusion.

'When you play a game, your competition is the opponent. When we start having mascots driving around at halftime and all that other stuff, then those are things that are bothersome."

T-Rac declined to comment.

Saints wide receiver Joe Horn's take on the mascot mugging: 'If that had been me, I would still be lying there. I would have owned a percentage of that field.'"

A few comments:

• Unlike Joe Horn, I would've gotten up and put the beat down on that f***ing racoon.
• I can't imagine Sean Payton saying that quote without breaking up or at least cracking a smile.
• T-Rac declines comment? Really? What other time in a mascot's life do they get to talk trash? "That's right McPherson! I'm furry and goofy looking and I still put your ass on the floor!"
  

I stumbled across this clip on NBA.com and found it really interesting.

If you didn't watch it, the clip ends with Kobe talking about how much soccer helped him develop his footwork and he also noted how those raised on soccer such as Steve Nash and Manu Ginobli play at a different "rhythm." Other noted players who have had excellent footwork due to soccer include Hakeem Olajuwon and Dikembe Mutumbo.

Perhaps the best idea for improving our nationwide basketball fundamentals is to stop sending kids to AAU and instead send them to AYSO.

x-posted at The Jello is Jiggling

I'm going to Vegas and won't be back until Tuesday evening. Wish me luck. If I see Hellmuth, I'll make sure to sock him in the face for all of you.

Miguel Tejada has publicly apologized for flicking off a Toronto crowd after a routine ground out in the eight inning of an eventual 4-3 loss to the Blue Jays. Fellow Hispanic Ozzie Guillen later justified Tejada's actions, insisting, "In my country, you do something like that and it is not the same as it is in this country."

Mike Sweeney returned from the 60-day DL this Tuesday, finding himself joining a Royals team that is 35 games back in the division. Although he admitted it has been a rough year for the ballclub, he added "It's not how you start, but how you finish." Is this some sort of trick statement? Because I am pretty sure the Royals were finished in the AL Central well before they started playing baseball this season.

After proclaiming he had never been to Maine, Governor John Baldacci has promised to send Ortiz 41 Maine lobsters, one for each home run he has hit this season. Shortly after hearing about the gift, the left out Manny Ramirez quickly demanded to be traded.

Over the past month or so there has been much controversy surrounding the Chorizo's one time appearance in the sausage races that occur in Miller Park, the home of the Milwaukee Brewers. As you may recall, the sausage races came to the attention of many sports fans on July 9th, 2003. That day is certainly a notorious one among sausages throughout the world, as that was the day former Pittsburgh Pirate Randall Simon hit an Italian sausage mascot over the head with his baseball bat.


So what is Simon up to nowadays? Yesterday the Texas Rangers signed Simon to a minor league contract, assigning him to rookie level ball in Arizona. Apparently the former sausage beater spent the summer in a Mexican League in Tijuana, and hit .348 with 18 Home Runs in only 63 games. According to Rangers' GM Jon Daniels, Simon "doesn't come with any risk." That is true, as long as Simon can resist the temptation to beat the meat.

Also, WBRS Sports Blog would like to promote a new sports novel, The Curse of Carl Mays, written by an avid WBRS Sports Blog reader, Howard Camerik. Check out the link to read more about his book on Amazon.com. Good luck Howard!

Certainly everyone is familiar with the George Foreman Grill. Over 55 million grills have been sold since the cooking device was introduced in 1995. In total, Foreman has earned over $150 million due to the outrageous sales numbers from this simple yet popular grill. Besides these facts, what's so interesting about the Foreman Grill? How about the fact that it really should be the Hulk Hogan Grill! In fact it is the Hulkster's name that should be synonymous with grills, not Foreman's. And further, it should be Hogan's pocket that is approximately $150 million heavier...here is the story.

In a recent episode of Hogan Knows Best, Hulk Hogan revealed that the Foreman Grill and all of the fame and wealth that came along with it could have been his. But rather, on a Spring day in 1995, Hogan was picking his two children up from school when his agent left a phone message for Hogan saying he had two products he needed two of his clients to endorse. Because Hogan was busy with his children, he never received the message. The other client that was called was George Foreman, who returned the call first and agreed to endorse the grill. When the Hulkster did eventually return the call, he was left with a mundane power mixer. The "Thunder Mixer" wasn't exactly a success, only selling 200,000 units, in comparison to Foreman's 55 million grills sold. It is facsinating to think how different our lives might be if we lived in a society filled with Hogan Grills, rather than Foreman Grills.


Hogan now has his own premium grill, Hulk Hogan's Ultimate Grill, available for only three payments of $49.99. Sure that is much more expensive than the Foreman grill, but you pay for quality brothaaaaaaaaa!

With the 2006 World Series of Poker coming to an intense stage, with only 27 contestants remaining, poker fans are starting to get into "that mood". The mindset I am talking about is the old "I could do this for a living. I could win this event" attitude. Maybe you might have some skills, but in order to really be competitive in these professional tournaments, you must posses the right mentality. WBRS Sports Blog recommends Camp Hellmuth...after 3 days and only $1999, you are on the right path to becoming a genuine jackass. If you practice the methods and approaches emphasized at Camp Hellmuth, eventually you will be able to experience for yourself memorable events similar to this and this. Good luck!

Anyone want to know whatever happened to the disgruntled, ex-Philadelphia Eagles WR Freddie Mitchell? Well the outspoken former first round pick has been spotted in the Cowboys Star, as he spent yesterday working out in Oxnard, California with the Dallas Cowboys. Can anyone envision Fred-Ex in blue and white? Wow, if First-Down Freddie makes the Cowboys roster I think we have actually found a way of making the two Cowboys-Eagles games this season even more exciting and controversial. Also, my mouth is salivating over the idea of Freddie, TO, and the Tuna sharing a sideline for an entire season.

The NFL season is just around the corner and with that comes Fantasy Football. There is much debate as to who should be the first pick in Fantasy Football drafts. So my question is to you, the reader, if you had the first pick in the draft who would you select? Here are some of the potential candidates...

Larry Johnson- This guy isn't a proven fantasy stud but last year this backup RB turned starter was an absolute freak. Once Priest went down and LJ took over in week 9, he spent the rest of the season as the featured back in Kansas City, averaging just over 150 ypg and crossed the goalline on 16 different occasions. Even Baby Matrix, aka Reggie Bush, advocates selecting Johnson #1 overall. The biggest question surrounding Larry is the fact that his All-Pro left tackle Willie Roaf is retiring. Can LJ succeed without big Willie? Is he worthy of the number 1 pick in the draft?

Shaun Alexander- This is perhaps the safest #1 pick in the draft. Alexander was the most dependable running back in the NFL last season, scoring in all but two games and going over 100 yards in 12 of his 16 games played. Is there any doubt that Alexander can't have a similar year to last season? Perhaps...If you have seen the cover of Madden's NFL 2007 game, you will notice Shaun Alexander is on the cover! The Madden curse is a real thing. Don't believe me? Just ask Daunte Culpepper, Donovan McNabb, Marshall Faulk and Michael Vick. All of those guys sustained serious injuries after being on the cover.

LaDainian Tomlinson- LT is Mr. Durability. The man has only missed one game over his last five seasons. You know you will get about 1500 yards from him and 16 touchdowns. With Drew Brees departing SD, LT will become even more of the focal point of the Chargers' offense, if that is even possible. I expect defenses to consistently put eight men in the box, daring Philip Rivers to try to beat them. Can LT produce with that kind of attention?

Peyton Manning- After producing the greatest individual statistical season in NFL history, Peyton Manning came back down to earth last year. Although his season was still great for a quarterback, it wasn't worthy of a #1 pick. Manning has to have another 2004 season in 2006? Probably not, but he has a better chance now that Edgerrin James is no longer a Colt.

So, who should go #1?

Who are the 50 greatest NBA players ever? Complete Sports has their list.

According to Out of Left Field, The Blue Jays are struggling in a bad, bad way.

Every streak must come to an end. [The Big Lead]

The Big Picture reports on Barry Bonds' 715 HR ball.

The 'ol ballcoach has a goofy way of voting. [Deadspin]

I think ridiculously absurd themed baseball nights at the ballpark are great! Most nowadays, in particular in Minor League parks, are way over the top and very funny because of that fact. This is the case in the Minor League Newark Bears' game this evening, in which it is Britney Spears Baby Safety Night! For those that don't know, Spears has been caught, "with her baby son, Sean Preston, sitting on her lap as she drove, and later, in a car seat facing forward rather than facing backward."

So, what exactly does this giveway include?

Fans attending Friday night’s game will receive information on baby car seat safety and a chance to win a free car seat from the American Automobile Association.

Perhaps the most entertaining part of this whole ordeal is that adults can dress up as babies in order to get in for free...

Those who dress as a baby, bring a baby toy or bring their baby — a child under the age of 4 — get in free.

The Newark Bears' opponent? The Road Warriors...how convenient.

"As the human population increases, many wildlife species are decreasing, and the primary reason is that humans fail to treat animals as friends." -- Yao Ming at a press conference on August 2nd

Yao Ming swore off eating Shark's Fin Soup yesterday. What have you done lately to help protect endangered species?

UPDATE: Yao has also filmed a commercial for WildAid, an organization determined to end illegal wildlife trade....How did he do that?

This Monday, Deadspin predicted that Giants tight end Jeremy Shockey would have to stir up the pot this season, with TO and Marcus Vick being good boys for the time being. It didn't take long for Deadspin's prediction to come to fruition. On Monday afternoon at Giants training camp we witnessed the funniest thing so far in this early NFL season. During practice Shockey was running a route downfield and when going up to catch a pass from Eli Manning, he received a nice elbow to the head from newly acquired safety Will Demps, and consequently suffered a minor concussion...Yesterday Demps came out and said there would be no apology, but rather, "It is what it is. It's a mild concussion. It's football."

By far the funniest part of this whole incident is the video of the play. Immediately after Demps hits Shockey, we see Demps gleefully jumping up and down, then high-fives Giant safety Gibril Wilson. All the meanwhile, Shockey is on the ground, concussed...Take a look for yourself.

(No Sound)

Late last evening the life of Tour de France champion Floyd Landis took a sharp turn for the worst. Although he insisted his abnormally large quantities of testosterone were 100% naturally produced, the results beg to differ. And with that it is only natural to carve Landis' face up on the notorious Mount Shamemore.


Landis is going to have to answer a lot of tough questions from the press over the next few days. I recommend he turn to the fellow heads on the mountain for advice...

Rafael Palmeiro: "Tell them that Lance Armstrong gave you a Vitamin B-12 shot. But it is essential that when you explain this you point your finger at the reporters over and over. Do it so often that they might be tempted to pull your finger thinking you are about to fart."

Barry Bonds: "Before I give you some advice, rub my big, bald head. You know I never thought my head would be bigger than Pedro Cerrano's massive melon...you live, you learn. Now look, this is a rather simple process. Tell the reporters that you 'unknowingly' injected testosterone into your body. If you didn't know you were doing it than technically it isn't your fault. In fact, it might be the substance's fault itself."

Jose Canseco: "Wow my eyes are lighting up with dollar signs right about now. Admit you took synthetic testosterone, write a book about it, and in the novel say that you personally injected Lance Armstrong with illegal substances. Trust Jose and you will never fail."